Christmas time can be a period which causes pressures and conflict within a relationship. Trying to manage different people’s expectations and traditions, having to deal with possible family members that you don’t always get on with, excitable children, and being together over the festive period without the distractions and escapes of work and hobbies, can be a possible recipe for disaster. At the Relationship Centre we often get a burst of couples just after the Xmas break due to the strain on the relationship.
To try and avoid the strain on the relationship, communication prior to the holidays can help avoid some of this. By sitting down and discussing how you feel about the holidays, your fears and your hopes, both of you can work together in making it as positive as possible. You might discuss;
• How to manage together, a difficult family member
• What you can both do when you feel flooded and need some quiet time to recharge
• How you are going to share the chores around the home over the holiday
• Who is responsible for different expectations around this period?
• Setting boundaries on spending on presents, food and drink etc, and/or spending time with other people and not the family etc
• Sharing the responsibility with the children
• How will you spend Xmas day?
• How will you find time to connect as a couple?
• What you can both do as a team if things do go wrong
By preparing and discussing, much of the stress within the relationship can be lessened and the holiday period enjoyed rather than dreaded.